Our heads in our mobile phones ...

I would look like I am a social media addict ... that is the perception.

I was in the Dentist last year, turning my phone to silent and checking my reminders ... It seemed I was a bad example, for a Dad who was with his daughters, one of them proceeded to get their mobile out too. The Dad pointed to a sign up displaying the words ... No mobile phones ...

And all the words and signs that surround us ... too much information ...

We are surrounded by words, I find all the notices and especially in supermarkets a bit overwhelming ... so mostly I am unable to register all the words. It is been interesting to say the least. I have been reprimanded, curtly told this cash till is closed, pointing to the sign ... In another store I notice the 'Till Closed' sign ... because it simply says the words ... with no slogans or adverts, obliterating the words that matter 

Already the redesigned local cafe ...

have made those tweaks and adjustments when something is newly done ... They have removed the bar and stools to make way for the cosier tables ... 

The shops are all about pancakes and stocking up the freezer promotions. The shelves are also well stocked for the spring cleaning ... The remnants of Christmas now gone ...  And of course the romance of a certain day, coming up. I am really pleased to see people take the time to say goodbye to whoever ... It makes a change from all the narkiness about ... you never know when that finally goodbye ... comes ... 

Films Age Like One ...

Getting to see, sometimes new, or already seen, an array of films and movies, reminding each time you get to see an old movie. It really shows the age of life ... not just us aging ...

I have seen sometimes, unintentionally the way the genres, directors, writers, actors, cinematographers through the times portray the life of times and ways ... non fictional or not. They have screened silent ones, black and white ones, the remakes, romantic, blatant violence, the old fashioned kisses and eroticism through the times. The early advent of colour, the old fashioned titles with '........' to the fancy styles we now have. Sometimes trying to outdo each other, with the opening credit styles too, to capture you into the atmosphere of what is to follow.

Even when you are at home and away from the world, with the news reminding you of your own personal events and the laws of life irritating you ... one can escape to the history and life in a less newsy way ...

The room that was lost to me ...

January 2016

The Kitchen

My sister thinks I fuss too much in this room ... Who knows ...  I was pottering about yet again early this evening. I made some cheese and tomato bread. This is the fact now, I can on a whim ... just make and bake. 

The home smells of home cooking tonight. It was one of those moments where the first taste of something different, again, in this particular kitchen, was beyond words. It is now syncing homemade soup, with homemade bread. A healthy way of making sure I am having the right nutrients, still much needed ... with a lack of interest in food, at times ... 

Where once ...

On first travelling back to Kernow after the aftermath of all that be felled us... the strangest thing on arrival there, besides the strange, but familiar environment, was the fact there were no dogs to welcome you, as was the norm ... besides the fact alone of never seeing them again ...

On Christmas Day, last I was snuggled up with the family dog at times, on spending the holidays with family up North... where once I would have had a dog or cat... I am not sure if I too, could say another goodbye ...

Landfill ... Recycling ... Clutter ... and Charity Shops ...

Our council is not quite on par with other councils ... and what you can actually recycle is very limited, still. This is another clutter issue ... space to line up the bottles, cans, paper, plastic, compost, and garden waste sometimes all separately, as can happen with my family and friends elsewhere in the country. 

For now the limitations suit me with our council; but not for the land. 

We have a small paper, cardboard, glass, can and clothes, shoes recycle bank, just a hop, skip and a jump away from where I live. That is another reason to go out for a walk out via this recycle area ... I attempt to clear as I go...  in the one touch rule that used to be ... before we were neglected.

Other ways of getting rid of the normal rituals of everyday life of new cars, white goods and other items particularly with a growing family ... but again excess clutter ... it is too overwhelming ...

I am not for making money over the web or other means as yet ... dollar signs do not ping in my eyes, or way of life. Again, time constraints in a cluttery life. And coming to pick up the goods with limited social skills. All this options I have attempted, or tried to research. It is too much faffing about with the volume here. Especially with the re-structuring of routines etc, 

Thank goodness for Charity Shops ... or people in need of things ...

This is the simple option for me, presently ... it is a case of filling up my shopping trolley, or a bag and taking on a journey out ... no fuss ... no transactions ... 

It is amazing what you can off load for them to make money or use ... I am not going into the bad name of all the money not always going where it should ... My philosophy has been if it makes other people happy for that moment ... whether the items are selected by whoever, before sorting and coding for sell ... or for the office supplies ... it has fulfilled a use ... rather than the landfill  ... 

Re design of the cafe ...

In a certain local supermarket ... It is now an express eat in or takeaway with cardboard cups and plastic cutlery ... 

A now limited menu of mostly unhealthy foods ... On par with the empty food of other certain chains. It reduces the staffing levels in washing and clearing up. Increases the illnesses this type of food is known to bring ... That is what partly killed my husband ... The strands of his health being killed by numerous set of unfortunate circumstances... 

And the amount of people walking badly with skin of a deathly colour is still continuing ... Add that to a non homely environment ... As with us ... Stress brings comfort elsewhere in the badness of life 

Even the professionals and the government dictate even though we have human rights issues involved these days in allowing us to live and work supposedly safely  ... But stand by and watch or let people die in hospital corridors ... Or environments within their own home ... Etc etc 

A Visit from the Site Manager to see how the repaired wall ...

was with my Mum today ... vehicles are now approaching the site from another entrance ... It gives the foundation's a bit of a reprieve ... 

Many, Many, Many, Words

have passed through this time. Observations on me and my ways now. My family see a very different Sally to the one they knew, before verbal contact was lost. 

I appreciate what has been relayed. 

I am different, my outlook is different. I will not waste time on certain things yet ... I did when I did not enter that cold world, some of us experience when we say goodbye for now, to those who meant so much to us. Add that to a life completely ripped apart, the empty nest, plans unfinished ... it goes on ... 

I was pre-warned, not from the professionals who should have been there, but thankfully someone on how I would feel on entering that home; when it was first cleared back ... before the forgotten temp accommodation stuff came back ... 

That Garden Wall ... From Impatience to Debris on a Monday ... The Repairs started the next day ...a Tuesday ...

And finished on a Wednesday ...

The corner of Mum's garden where the wall was accidentally demolished, is now back in place from the debris strewn across the pavement. This had happened when an impatient lorry driver tried to get past a car blocking part of the junction misjudging the space left ...  If it was to happen ... it was handy they were a building site firm.

It is usually done ... dreckly. 

Moody Monday into Tweaking Tuesday ...

following on from the last post ... after an email from my sister to get the broken wall swiftly fixed without any injury ... the builders from the site started to fix the ruined wall, the following day. Progress.

I await news today on further progress. I am kept in the loop with this for my information, which means I am coming back. This is the difficulty of setting up home away from my family and friends, when you meet someone in a different area. It would not be so bad, if there was not so much prejudice with the complexity of hubby ... I will not go into detail ... again it is not for me to discuss publically certain elements within prejudice so close to home here ... that adversely affects our daughter too ...

With loving support; we get through it ... it helps us, in helping others, who too are in similar positions, to ease the mind off our own dilemmas and we are not alone ...

Moody Monday ...

on the bluest day of the year. While I was in Cornwall with my family, they had just started building near Mum's. Consequently heavy goods vehicles are making regular and thundering trips on and off site passing by their home. Today a car parked awkwardly at the junction, and the lorry got impatient, misjudged the gap and knocked down the corner of the garden wall. It was witnessed by a neighbour, who assisted Mum in getting the start of this organising the work, this now involves. The driver did not knock on the door to say he had damaged the property. Apparently he was angry. The driver who parked awkwardly was not happy either. It is my family who have the hassle, that our Mum does not need. The garden is her sanctuary, and more so in her life now, without our late Dad. At least so far, no one is hurt. It will make the wall unstable and us liable, although in this instance, there was a witness. 

Mundane Mash Making

with the dishes it still creates for one alone to clear up ... instead of the perpetual jacket I get teased for, the ease of just slotting it in the oven, compact in its skin with minimal fuss and clearing up after, creating a warm kitchen in the process. I did a twist on the mash today using what I had in stock.

Reminding me of a blog once read of a designer; who had knitters usually of a certain age for the reliability in getting their designs knitted up consistently. And picking up the knitting, while the potatoes were on the boil ... I loved the the way the men once and now in our life, and their way in the patience and skill in this task, creating the right texture and taste. The latest male in the family sharing his secrets of a good mash. Another shared interest with my daughters boyfriend.

It also reminded me of last year, when the crisis team came into my life, with their daily visits on the weekend. They enjoyed the delicious smell eliminating out the kitchen, as I improved in my well being. That was a jacket potato cooking. It was a shame they were too busy to share in a simple basic meal, they too enjoyed for that moment in time. 

Much Amuses me

As it frustrates ...

A certain crisp brand thinking it is being wonderful to reduce the packaging, to save space and easier to store by repackaging a design, I thought long overdue.

A little product is the norm across most food products ... for a lot of price. 

Or on those BOGOF; which again can be wasteful. 

The food industry is full of waste. And mess. Again being surrounded by waste and mess in daily life, you become desensitised. It is probably why some people that did pass through our home, did ot know how to deal with mess ... and mind ... 

The Shadows ...

... still evident again on my recent travels ... It is so good when I get to open spaces. It is a shame Austrailia is so far away. The expanse of land there would suit me. I can hear the negative retorts now. Just as I did at the Eden Project when I said I could live here, on seeing a simple natural building with a veranda looking out and conversing with nature. A passing gentleman made the usual jovial comic retort on the down side on living in such an environment, on hearing my comment. 

All the Senses Come into Play ...

The vibrancy of colour after the dankness, the smells of laundry gels on people, not just the perfume or aftershave, but the smell of whether clothes were freshly washed or not. 

The sounds outside were a din to me. Hearing the sound of my own voice. The touch of the outside air on my skin. The wind through my hair. Feeling the breeze on a summers day. The petals on the ground in the spring. Scrunching through the colourful leaves in the Autumn. After a while even the grey days of the winter, with the mist hanging in the low sky. The clouds. the sunsets. The dawns. The dramatic skies from a blue, blue sky on a sunny day or the red skies in the morning, the orange glow at night to the storm clouds brewing. The whiteness of clouds set against the green, green trees.

One Thundery day last August, walking in a storm. And more recently getting drenched on the walk home from a journey up North. All the feels, the touch, smells sights and sounds we bemoan about, as well as get excited over from being out and about. When you do not see it for a while, it is amazing ...